31 de dezembro de 2017

Notes on “Book review: Margaux Fragoso’s ‘Tiger, Tiger: a Memoir'”.

Filed under: Livros, Saúde e bem-estar — Tags:, — Yure @ 20:41
  1. “Tiger, Tiger” is an autobiographical work and the central theme was the sexual abuse suffered by the book’s author.
  2. Although the adult who had a relationship with her had not forced her into the act, she felt pressured to do things that she considered repulsive, sexual favors, because the guy would insist until she gave in (manipulation).
  3. The adult also used emotional manipulation, making her feel guilty for not doing these favors, thereby exerting non-physical force.
  4. Rivas says that this experience was negative and that one of the factors that contributed to this was the fact that there were no other adults supervising her and the adult with whom she was having a relationship with, so that the child had no one to turn to if she felt that her rights were being violated.
  5. The young storyteller had to masturbate the adult and give him oral.
  6. Unlike positive relationships, the adult in question did not give the child any pleasure, that is, he only used her.
  7. The minor realizes that she is being used and feels bad about it.
  8. The adult was also highly possessive, limiting the minor’s access to “rivals” and attempting to kill her.
  9. However, it is important to note that this adult was completely abnormal and even suicidal, asking the girl to kill him if possible.
  10. Spoiler: he kills himself.
  11. All this could have been avoided if the girl had a good family, but her family was also toxic, so much so that she tried to be loved by the adult who abused her.
  12. Although Fragoso says that it was the pedophilia that caused this adult to take violent behavior, Rivas reminds us that attraction to minors does not include violent tendencies in it’s concept, which means that what motivated the adult to harm the child was not his pedophilia (which, perhaps, he did not have, since most child sexual abusers do not meet the diagnostic criteria for pedophilia), but the mental problems he had.
  13. The same thing could have happened in a relationship between two adults.
  14. If there are minors who feel bad about these relationships, there are also minors who feel good about them.
  15. Rivas points out the following factors that made the negative relation: 
    1. Insistence of the adult, that is, the disrespect to the “no”.
    2. Egocentric gratification, that is, the adult did not care what the girl felt.
    3. Jealousy, envy of the friends of the minor.
    4. Focus exclusively on sex, the adult did not see the minor as anything other than a sex toy.
    5. Lies.
    6. Anger at seeing the child grow up.
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